Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

I know we’ve all heard this saying before and I’m sure you’re all tired of hearing it, but I just wanted to write a little something to give hope and reassurance to those that may be going through a long distance relationship.  I know from experience that absence really can make the heart grow fonder.  I grew up with my mom constantly going out of the country for work for months at a time and saw my parents’ relationship actually IMPROVE from it.  They fought less, they missed each other more, and their patience improved.  It made them both appreciate each other’s love more and learn the importance of what the other had to say and felt.

So for those of you doubting whether or not it can work between you and your significant other, just know that yes it will get frustrating and you may feel lonely at times, but you also will gain such a deeper appreciation for the other person.  Simple things like the sound of their voice or holding hands will seem like the best things in the world.  Here are a few tips to keep the love alive and the relationship strong:

  1. Have a mutual understanding of what you both want.  Reassuring one another that you have the same amount of love, care about each other equally, and are putting forth the same effort to make the relationship work will really enhance any relationship; especially a long distance one.  Feeling secure and knowing that you are both on the same page is extremely important.
  2. Don’t OVER communicate.  I know you’re probably thinking, “What is this girl talking about?!”, but seriously sometimes less is more.  Just because you don’t see each other doesn’t mean you need to compensate that by talking 24/7.  It will do more harm than good.  Just like when you see someone too often and can start to get super annoyed by their presence, the same goes for if you talk to someone too much.  You may think it is helping, but it is actually hurting the relationship.  Give yourselves a chance to miss each other.
  3. Keep the sexual attraction strong.  Don’t let the spark die or forget what it feels like to kiss and hold each other.  Set a night aside each week for you two to say how much you miss each other in both an emotional and physical way. Flirt a little!
  4. Communicate regularly.  You want to make sure you don’t NOT talk to each other.  Seeing a “good morning” and “good night” text lets the other know they are thinking about them and want to make the effort.  Sending photos is also a good way to remind your lover that you are trying to include them in your life.
  5. Be honest.  Trust will always be one of the most important things to have in order for a relationship to work.  Being in a long distance relationship makes it that much more valuable.  Once you lose trust, the relationship will have a hard time recovering, if it will at all.

I hope these tips help any of you going through a long-distance relationship.  Whether it’s just for a month, 5 months, or for up to a year or more, these should help you maintain a strong trusting relationship.

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